Answer:  Clairvoyance means clear-seeing.  It is the psychic faculty that goes through the third eye chakra located between your eyebrows.  With clairvoyance you see images in your mind’s eye, the same place you see dreams at night with your physical eyes closed.  It’s the same place you go when you daydream or remember an event from your past.  We all have the ability to see in our mind’s eye.

When you use this ability to do psychic readings, something a little different is happening.   You’re opening your mind to receiving information that will help you or help someone else.  In other words, you’re receiving an energetic download from the universe, guides, Source, angels, etc. which you must interpret so that you can help others, as in a psychic reading, or get greater clarity on your own path.

So if you’re already able to tune in to these images, how do you discern which are from “out there” and which are just fear, logic, or ego-driven?  How do you get to a place where you know for sure when you are receiving an energetic download from spirit or when you are just thinking with your own mind? 

Get High
Not on drugs!  On vibration.  You need to get to a high vibration before opening yourself up to receiving clairvoyant images.  Do this with meditation, deep breathing, or putting yourself in a state of love, joy, and gratitude.  If you do this work in a low vibrational state such as anger, fear, depression, or guilt, you may not connect with the beings who have your highest interest at heart.  It doesn’t have to be a permanent state, just get yourself to a high vibration before you start.  My free ebook, 10 Ways to Raise Your Vibration in Under 10 Minutes will help you with this.

Boot Up Your Chakras
Your chakras are the energy centers in your body.  They’re like the batteries of your soul.  When was the last time you replaced the batteries or made sure they were working?  Read my article on chakras and boot them up before you tune in.  Clearing and opening your chakras will clear away any negative emotional residue that might be clinging to you.  And it’s also a signal to your guides that you’re tuning in.  Think of opening your chakras like extending your antenna.

Climb to Greater Heights
Along with raising your vibration, you need to raise your energetic frequency.  This means sloughing off the daily worries and focusing your mind on connecting with the beings who are going to send you the information you need to help you on your path.  So once you’ve gotten to a deep meditative place and opened your chakras, raise your frequency.  I do this by climbing a staircase in my mind.  I count as I go and continue to do deep breathing.  Counting keeps you from thinking about what you’re going to have for dinner, the bills you need to pay, and the other flotsam and jetsam that invade your mind when you meditate.

Find Your Guides
You don’t want information from just anyone.  That would be dangerous.  If you’re using clairvoyance to do a reading for someone else, you’ll want to connect with your conduit guide (mine is named Bob), so he or she can help you tune in to other people’s spirit guides.  If you’re using your clairvoyance to get information about your own path, just connect with your own spirit guides.  If you haven’t done that yet, get on it.  It’s really important to connect with higher vibrational beings before you open yourself to receiving an energetic download that could affect your life.

Learn to Interpret the Information
Receiving images isn’t that difficult, relatively speaking.  You’ve been using your mind’s eye for years.  Interpreting what you get is what’s difficult.  We’re always receiving information; from other people, from fear, from guides, from expectations and memory.  When you’re receiving information from a spirit guide or other high vibrational being, sometimes they send metaphors.  Symbols.  You have to figure out what they mean, just like you would in a dream.  This takes practice, but it’s critical if you want to get accurate information for yourself or others.

Practice
If you’re planning to use your clairvoyance to do readings for others, nothing takes the place of practice.  I did more than 100 readings with people to make sure I was interpreting the energetic downloads properly.  It wasn’t until I recognized the difference between my own stuff and stuff coming from the guides that I went professional.  Keep practicing until you’re sure when you’re connecting and when you’re not. 

If you’re using clairvoyance for yourself, you still need to practice.  Apply the information you get and see if it worked out the way you expected.  In other words, test the information on yourself.  If you got it wrong, it could be a problem receiving the info or a problem interpreting it. Keep practicing.

Trust
I can’t stress this enough.  You must learn to trust your guides and the information coming through.  I can’t tell you how many times in the beginning I got information that didn’t make any sense to me, but which made perfect sense to the person I was reading for.  One time during a reading I got an image of a woman putting out a place setting (plate, fork, knife, napkin, glass, etc.) but in the image she put the knife and fork on the wrong sides and her boss yelled at her.  So I’m getting ready to interpret the image and she tells me it doesn’t need interpretation.  Turns out she was a set decorator and just a few days prior to the reading she actually did set a place and put the knife and fork on the wrong sides and her boss yelled at her. 

In another reading I saw my client as a 6-year-old girl on a bicycle and she ran into a tree, knocked her tooth out and brought it home to show her mom.  Again I thought it was a metaphor, but she told me that really did happen to her when she was 6.  So I learned that sometimes the images I get are not metaphors at all.  It takes time and experience to know the difference.

***

We all have psychic abilities.  Not everyone develops them.  Although the discussion above dealt with clairvoyance, it’s very similar with clairaudience, clairsentience, and claircognizance, or really any psychic tool.  Give your abilities the time and attention they deserve, and before you know it, you’ll have an excellent tool you can use to make your life and the lives of others even better!

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Developing Psychic Abilities – An Interview with Erin and Steve Pavlina

This was my first filmed interview, and we had a lot of fun doing it.  I’ve been wanting to foray into more speaking and interviews, so between this interview and the radio show I did a few days ago, plus the workshop coming up in Vegas, I’m manifesting my goal nicely.  I can be a lot more expressive and connected with my audience by doing interviews and workshops, so that’s something I want to do continue doing.

Hope you enjoy!

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Distracting thoughts during meditation are extremely common.  If you want to reach a higher vibration so that you can have a chat with your guides you’ll need to learn how to tune out distractions and tune in to the higher frequencies.  So how do you do that?  There are several ways.

Get it all out first
Make a list of all the things you need to do so you won’t forget them.  Tune in to what you need to do that day and get it all down on paper.  Take your time and do it right.  Then trust that everything you need to remember is on that list.  Set it aside and prepare for meditation.

Turn on some relaxation music
Meditation music is wonderful.  There are so many CDs out there that you really can’t go wrong.  I love R. Brian Caldwell’s music and I use it to tune in during readings and meditation.  It gives me an aural focal point to help my mind from becoming distracted.  Play it softly in the background.

Create a sacred space for meditation
Some people find it helpful to have a special place they use solely for meditation.  Some pillows on the floor, a yoga mat, a certain chair in the house.  Selecting one single place where you always meditate will help you create an anchor so that when you sit there,  your mind automatically goes into meditation mode.  Don’t do anything else in this spot like talking on the phone, journaling, etc.  Just save the space for meditation.

Concentrate on your breathing
Breathing is an important component of meditation.  Typically you want to breathe in through your nose for a certain count, like 4 or 6, and then breathe out slowly through your mouth for a few beats longer than that.  I personally am not a big fan of controlled meditative breathing as I actually find it distracting to try to keep the count.  So what I do is take three deep breaths to center myself then I just breathe deeply and deliberately without trying to hold my breath for any certain length of time.  You can concentrate on breathing without making it an exercise in holding your breath.  During your meditation just keep breathing through your nose and out through your mouth.  If your nasal passages are blocked it’s okay to just breathe through your mouth, and if you suffer from dry mouth it’s also okay to breathe in and out through your nose.  There’s really no wrong way to breathe during meditation.  As long as you keep breathing, you’re good!

Count
One thing I do count is stairs.  When you meditate, you have the option of putting yourself in a quiet, centered, peaceful state with the intention of just being in the present moment.  If that’s your goal, you won’t need to count; just breathe.  But usually when I meditate, it’s with the goal of connecting with spirit guides, my higher self, angels, Source, or a deceased person.  In that case I have to raise my frequency, or my vibration.  To do that, I select a metaphorical way of climbing: stairs, an escalator, or an elevator if I’m in a hurry.  I prefer the stairs though.  So while I’m doing my meditative deep breathing, I am counting the stairs as I go up them.  This keeps my mind from wandering as I have to focus on the count to get it right.  If I’m in an elevator I watch the buttons light up from 1 to 100 and keep count of them as I go.  It accomplishes the same thing.  When I use an escalator I count to 10 while I’m on the escalator and then stop off of that one and onto another one that takes me still higher for another count of 10.  It all accomplishes the same goal and keeps my mind from wandering.

Guided meditation
Another way to keep your mind on your meditation is to listen to a guided meditation program.  In these programs someone else is telling you where you are, what you see, what you hear and feel, etc.  As you listen and concentrate on what they’re saying, you won’t have time for distractions.  Guided meditations are great when you’re just starting out and aren’t sure where to go in your mind.  Later you can create your own meditation ritual with your own locales, scenes, and sounds.

Acknowledge the thoughts and let them go
Even with a lot of practice you can still end up with the random thought passing through your mind while trying to meditate.  That’s okay.  Don’t beat yourself up about it.  Let the thought come, acknowledge it, and then let it go.  Get right back to what you were doing, you don’t need to start over.  If you try too hard to prevent thoughts from coming in, you won’t be relaxed enough to meditate or reach a higher vibration. 

***

Meditation is a wonderful tool you can use to bring peace to your life or to connect with your spirit guides, higher self, angels, and even Source.  Don’t let distracting thoughts stop you from learning to meditate.  Just learn how to handle them when they appear.  With practice you’ll find yourself getting less and less distracted and more and more in tune.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Receiving communication from the other side is a gift, in my opinion, however you must be the one who decides when that communication takes place.  Being too open is like leaving your front door unlocked and ajar; the deceased are going to push their energy at you whenever they see you can get a message to a living loved one. 

When I first started my work as a medium, I was open all the time.  Once I was chatting with the check out girl at a clothing store and her deceased grandmother started going on about how her granddaughter was going to give birth to a girl and name it after her.   At dinner one night with a couple, I saw the woman’s deceased father standing behind her and he had a lot to say about his death and his children.  Back then I blurted out everything as it came to me.  But one day I got information for a woman who didn’t want to hear from her deceased abusive husband.  I realized that not everyone is open to this sort of communication, so I stopped doing “drive by” readings.

The way I stopped receiving unwanted communication when I wasn’t working was thanks to my conduit guide Bob.  Bob is the guide who acts like a bouncer.  The only way a spirit can communicate with me now is if Bob lets him through.  On some occasions a strong and powerful spirit will get my attention when I’m not working, but it’s usually pretty important or urgent or Bob wouldn’t have let them through. 

If you don’t have a conduit guide, and I highly suggest you have one if you are a medium, then you’ll need to work on tuning out the constant influx of information.  You’ve got to turn off the psychic radio when you’re not working or wanting the information.  You can do this by pulling your chakras in tighter.  One of the reasons you’re getting so much information all the time is probably because your chakras are open too wide.  Your energy is brushing up against people’s auras and you’re getting an instant download about that person’s life.  Keeping your chakras open that wide can have unwanted side effects, as you can inadvertently take on the negative emotions of another person.

Also, stop using your psychic radio like a police scanner.  Most people new to psychic abilities scan every channel all the time.  They do this unconsciously.  This is one reason why negative and lower vibrational beings can bug you; you’re tuned in to their channel.  You’re allowing your “radio dial” to be pulled to a lower channel just because something is being broadcast.  Learn to be discerning. 

Learn to tune in only when asked or when the situation is urgent or important.  Get with a conduit guide who will agree to filter out the riff raff so you get communication when you want with who you want.  Pull in your chakras so you’re not empathically detecting every little issue with people you pass on the street.

If you do receive communication you feel is really important, you’ll have to learn to be very sensitive to how you pass on the information.  Some people think mediums work for the Devil, so if you blurt out your information, instead of being grateful you may get someone making the sign of the cross at you. If I’m with someone who knows I’m a medium, I will usually say, “Oh I seem to be in contact with someone who would really like to pass on a message to you.  Would you like to hear it?”  I’ve actually had people politely decline, but most of the time they are eager to hear the information.  If I’m with someone who does not know me and does not know I’m a medium, I usually keep my mouth shut, plus these situations don’t come up so much now that I have Bob standing guard.

Psychic work can be energetically draining, and mediumship more so.  You’ve got to guard your own energy.  To the other side, you’re walking around with a little light above your head that conveys, “I’m on and I can hear you.”  The deceased will flock to you if you you’re not careful so that you will pass on messages to their living loved ones.  You must be the one who decides what information gets through.  If you don’t control the information and when it comes through, it can overwhelm  you and cause you to become very unbalanced.   When this happens a lot of psychics try to turn off their abilities.  Instead I simply recommend becoming the commander in chief of your ability.  Take responsibility for the gift, and learn how to use it properly.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Answer:  When I was a teenager a lot of scary beings used to visit me.  I was able to take control of the situation and open up a can of astral whoop ass on them, but I don’t recommend that approach for most people.

In my twenties I shut down my psychic abilities as best I could so I could get away from that life.  That worked pretty well for a while.  When I met Steve, though, he encouraged me to reopen that part of myself and continue exploring.  I found that when I opened up to the psychic realm as an adult, it wasn’t scary anymore.  This was due in large part to the fact that my vibration had changed.  I was no longer susceptible to fear.  I was vibrating a lot closer to love, so those darker entities just didn’t bother me.  We were not on the same channel anymore.

But like you, I was always afraid that ghosts or spirits would try to get my attention by appearing in my bedroom at night, in the dark, and scare me.  I could easily see having a heart attack if that happened!  When I started to see I had an ability that could help others, though, I knew I had to somehow get over my fear.

That’s when the tv show, Ghost Whisperer, came to my rescue.  In this show the main character, Melinda Gordon, is a medium who regularly sees and talks to spirits.  When they appear to her, they almost always startle her, but she is never afraid of them.  That’s when I realized that being startled is different than being afraid.  I decided that if I had to, I could live with being startled.  So I made a deal with my guides, telling them I would open myself back up to these psychic abilities I’d had practically my whole life, as long as they knew I didn’t want to see dead people in my room in the middle of the night.  And I told them if seeing the spirits in my room at night was the only way to help them, I would learn to deal with it.

As it turns out, I needn’t have worried.  I have a conduit guide named Bob that prevents spirits from presenting to me unless I’m working.  Only three times in the last three years have I had a spirit present to me when I wasn’t officially working.  All three came in very gently with me though, and all three came at night.  When you think about it, why would they want to scare me?  If I’m scared, I’m not going to be able to help them.

I did do a reading once where a spirit appeared to me in my White Room (the mental construct I go to when I do readings) and she nearly gave me a heart attack.  She had shot herself in the face and showed me the whole image.  And she was standing right over me.  It took me a moment to collect myself and I was quite startled.  She wasn’t trying to frighten me, she was just in an intense situation and probably didn’t know that I would react so strongly to her grisly visage. 

So my advice is to get a clear connection with your guides and tell them what you are and are not willing to tolerate.  Also, make sure you vibrate at a reasonably high frequency normally.  If you’re depressed, angry, sad, ashamed, or guilty you might attract lower vibrational beings when you open yourself up.  And lastly, decide in advance that if a spirit does show up, you’ll only be startled and not afraid.  They aren’t there to hurt you.   They’re there to reach out for your help.  If you have this gift, think of all the good you can do with it.  Don’t let a little fear stop you.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Answer:  I get this question periodically so I figured it was a good time to answer it publicly. 

I discourage couples from getting a reading together where they are on the phone at the same time.  Experience has shown me that when spirit guides want to bring up something related to the marriage that sometimes the couple clams up their energy because they are afraid the guides are about to reveal something they don’t want their partner to know.  It can get uncomfortable real fast.  And when a person chokes off their energy like that, I can sometimes lose the connection to their guides.

Even when people don’t think there is a relationship problem, sometimes the guides need to tell you something that you need to know about the relationship or the partner, etc.  Imagine what would happen if you had a controlling guy in a relationship with a submissive woman and they were both on the phone.  The guides may need to talk to the woman about developing her personal power so she can get up the nerve to leave the guy or make serious changes in the relationship, but if the guides bring that up while the controlling guy is on the phone, she’s going to be in real trouble when the call is ended.

Or what happens if one partner is hiding debt from the other and the guides want to provide counsel on how to get out of debt?

The other issue that comes up is personal privacy.  Sometimes the guides will bring up issues from a person’s past, such as sexual abuse, because they need to talk to the sitter about it.  It’s possible the sitter’s spouse isn’t even aware of their partner’s previous sexual abuse.  How fun would that be for it to come out during a reading?  Because I am an intuitive counselor, personal issues do come up in readings sometimes, but the guides only bring them up if it will have a direct bearing on the challenges my sitter is facing, and where the resolution of those challenges will help them on their life path.

On rare occasions I will let a couple split their 30 minute reading into 2 15-minute readings, but that doesn’t really give us enough time to cover all aspects of a person’s life, and it doesn’t leave time for many follow up questions.  It’s sort of like asking a doctor to open you up, remove half your tumor, and then sew you up again.  While I’ve got you “open” so to speak, I want to finish up in there before I sew you back up.

Most people take notes during their reading, or record their reading with me, and then share what they want to share with their partner later.  It allows them to choose what they will share and what they want to keep private.  Readings are very personal and often times emotional, so think long and hard before you bring your partner in with you.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

First of all, not all things want to be found.  What do I mean by that?  Sometimes there is a lesson in loss.  Why did you lose your Blackberry?  Are you spending too much time connecting with technology instead of with people in person?  Why did you lose your diamond wedding ring?  Is it symbolic of what’s happening in your marriage?  Pretend you’re in a dream and your dream self lost this item.  How would you interpret the dream?  How do you feel about the loss?  Do you feel irresponsible?  Victimized?  Forlorn or bereft?  What does the loss mean to you?

Second, is this an item you keep losing?  Maybe you’re not supposed to find it or have it in your life.  Consider that before you tear up the house or your plumbing.

I know what you’re thinking.  “Screw that symbolic sign crap, Erin, please just help me find my cell phone!”  Okay, fine fine.  Hold your horses.  If the item is meant to come back to you then there is a way to use psychic abilities to find it.

First you have to understand that there are many ways to find lost items using intuitive abilities.  If one way doesn’t work, try another one.

Pendulum Technique
Get a pendulum.  You can buy one online or from a new age store, or you can make a simple one using some thread and a bolt so that the bolt is hanging at the end of the thread.   Tell the universe what direction  you want to be “yes” and what direction will be “no.”  You can choose clockwise or counter clockwise, or you can do horizontal vs. vertical lines.  Sit quietly, put your elbow on the table to steady your arm, hold the top of the pendulum, and start asking “yes-no” questions.  “Is my cell phone in the house?”  “Is it in my bedroom.”  Keep playing until you find it.  If your subconscious mind doesn’t know where the item is, you probably won’t find it using a pendulum.

Use Clairsentience
If your primary psychic modality is clairsentience, which means clear-feeling, start walking around the area where you think you probably lost your precious item and try to feel a tug in your midsection pulling you in the direction of your lost item.  Or you might feel a hot or cold sensation telling you if you’re near or far, respectively.  You might feel a tingling sensation in your hands when you get close.  Don’t use your logic.  Feel for the tugging, temperature, or tingle.  If the item is in the area you’re searching, you could easily find it using this technique.

Use Clairaudience
If your primary psychic modality is clairaudience, which means clear-hearing, sit quietly, get meditative, and say in your mind, “Cell phone, where are you?”  Listen for the answer.  Again, you’re going to have to push your logic away.  If you could have found it with logic, you wouldn’t need to find it with intuition.

Use Clairvoyance
If your primary psychic modality is clairvoyance, which means clear-seeing, sit quietly, get meditative, and ask your item where it is.  Then allow an image to form in your mind’s eye.  Maybe you’ll see a movie play out in your mind.  Maybe you’ll just see it lying inside your couch cushion.  Maybe you’ll get a symbol or metaphor that must be figured out.

Use Claircognizance
If your primary psychic modality is claircognizance, which means clear-knowing, then turn off your rational mind completely and simply walk to where your item is, with confidence and assurance.  Don’t even think about it, just go there.  Yep, this one’s hard if you’re not a gifted claircognizant.

Ask Your Guides
If you’ve learned how to communicate with your guides, then get meditative and go talk to them.  Ask them where your item is.  They might tell you outright, or they might tell you why you lost it, and they might tell you that you’ll never see it again because finding it is not in your best interest.  I hope you’ve sent some gratitude to your guides recently.  Maybe they’re holding your Blackberry hostage.

Ask the Dream Master
Ask the guy who lives in your ceiling and sends you those lovely Angelina/Brad dreams if he’d be willing to show you where you lost your item.  He’s often more accommodating than the guides.  If you’re not good at remembering your dreams, this probably won’t work too well for you.

Ask Your Future Self
You’ve got a past self – he’s the dumb-dumb who lost the item in the first place – so why not ask your future self where you ended up finding it.  I love this technique.  Sit quietly and get meditative.  Meet your future self in your mind’s eye and have a conversation with him.  He might say, “Oh that?  Yeah we finally remembered we loaned it to Cathy and forgot to get it back.”  Or he might say, “Oh that?  Yeah, we put the ring on the side of the counter and it fell right into the sink.  Took us an hour to fish it out and the plumber charged us $100.  And by the way, don’t drink so much next Saturday, that’s gonna be one hell of a hangover!”

If At First You Don’t Succeed, Try Try Again
This takes practice and skill.  If you’re not used to divining locations out of thin air, cut yourself some slack if you fail to find your object the first time.  Keep working at it.  You will get better over time.  If you’re too emotionally attached to finding this object, that alone can block your success. 

Call a Professional
If all of these methods fail, call the professionals.  You can book a reading with a psychic, just be sure he or she is good at locating missing objects.  That is not my forte so do not book a reading with me to find your ring.  More than likely your guides will tell you something about it that you don’t want to know.

The Moral of the Story
Keep your precious items where they belong, or put a locator chip on them (or in them as the case may be.)  And try not to be a loser in the first place.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

We’re going to have to use an analogy to understand this best.  The stork drops you off in a forest and you get to wander around the forest for the rest of your life.  Before you were born, you decided you wanted to see certain sites around the forest, but when you are born, you forget what they were.  So in comes your spirit guides.  Imagine they are floating above the forest.  They always know where you are and so they know where you’ve been.  They can also see where you’re going, up to a point.

Let’s say you’re on the path that leads to a big lake.  You go see a psychic who can communicate with your guides and you ask, “Am I ever going to find a lake?”  The guides report to the psychic, “Yes, she is really close.  She turns the next bend and it will be right in front of her, but she can’t see it from where she’s standing.”  So the psychic says, “Yes, it looks like you’re going to find that big lake.  Just keep doing what you’re doing and keep going the way you’ve been going.  You can’t miss it.” 

But let’s say you ask, “Am I ever going to find a lake?” and the guides tell the psychic, “There’s definitely a lake there, but she’s about 30 miles away.  In order for her to get to the lake she’s going to need to take a right, then a left, then two more rights, and a final left.  But between her and that lake are some things she’ll have to deal with, like a hungry jaguar, a pit with spikes in it, and a tree that’s laying across the path.”  So the psychic tells the sitter, “I do see that as an option however it’s not clear whether you will actually reach the lake.  There are going to be some challenges along the way, and you may make decisions that veer you away from reaching the lake.”  The sitter is annoyed.  “Do you see me at the lake or not?  It’s a simple question?”  To which the psychic, if she is honest and ethical, must reply, “You are capable, you have the ability, but you are not close enough to this goal for them to say for certain that you will arrive there.  We’ll have to see.  To increase your chances, however, you should probably invest in a hunting rifle, a big wooden plank, and a chainsaw.”  And that is the benefit in getting a reading with someone who can communicate with the guides hovering above your forest, to prepare you to face what’s around the corner, and to inform you of what you’ll need to safely navigate the road ahead.

I’ve learned something interesting after doing more than 1400 readings and getting a lot of feedback as to how things turned out for people afterwards.   I can tell when something is definitely going to happen and when something is so far off in the distance that one single choice you make along the way can derail you.  I liken these two options to shooting a gun, or spraying silly string.  When you shoot a gun, that bullet is going out with such force and trajectory that nothing is going to stop it and it’s going to hit its mark.  When you spray a can of silly string, the force is weak and the trajectory is almost impossible to calculate.  So when people ask me a question about their future, I can tell by whether I feel the gun or the silly string how likely or how close they are to achieving this desire.

Imagine being in your forest and there was only one path, and all you had to do was follow it to reach the other side of the forest.   You weren’t allowed to veer off the path, explore deeper territory, or even back track and try another path.  Why bother living?  What would be the point?  In reality, we are dropped off in this forest and we’re allowed to explore at our own discretion.  As a youngster, we follow our parents who make decisions about where we’re going, but as we get older, we are asked to take the lead and go off and find our own path. 

When I read for people I sometimes see people latch on to others in the forest and follow them on their path.  You’re allowed to do this, but make sure you get the opportunity to explore the parts of the forest that appeal to you too.  It’s not healthy to just follow someone else your whole life.

Also, you will meet people in the forest who are coming from the same place you’re planning to go.  Ask them what the path ahead of you looks like.  They might say, “Well there’s a jaguar loose on the path that way, be careful” or “You are really close to a beautiful lake.  Take the next right and you’ll be practically sitting on top of it.  You can’t miss it.”

Sometimes people ask me, “What is the name of my future husband and where and what exact day will he and I meet?”  Unless that’s going to happen tomorrow, do you understand now why a psychic cannot tell you with 100% accuracy the answer to that question?  However, if you ask, “Do you see love approaching on my path?  Is a relationship coming?” that I can definitely get an answer to.  When the guides look down on the path they can see other people who are about to interact with you.  If you’re standing close to a good potential partner, we can give you the nudge you need to “run into him.” 

Some psychics are loathe to sound anything less than omniscient.  They do a disservice to the craft though when they tell you something is a definite when in fact there are 10 ways for you to be sidetracked from your goal.  So if you ask them, “Where and when will I meet my future husband?” and they say, “10am on June 18th 2 years from now at the Starbucks on the corner” you’re like, “Oh wow, that’s incredible!”  Yeah, check back in two years and you’ll realize it probably didn’t happen and that psychic is nowhere to be found.  And in the meantime, maybe your prince charming ran into you a year earlier and you ignored him because the psychic told you it wasn’t going to happen until June 18th two years from then.

You must also understand that the guides may know something that is about to happen to you but can’t tell you because it will rob you of your power or derail something important.  A man wrote to me recently to tell me that about a month after his reading with me his wife was in a car accident and hurt her neck very badly.  He wanted to know why the guides didn’t warn him.  First, it’s not the responsibility of our guides to warn us about every pitfall life has to offer.  We wouldn’t grow if we could magically avoid all hardship.  Second, maybe she wasn’t headed for a car accident at the time of the reading, but chose a path afterward that led her to this accident.  Third, what if she was tooling along properly on her path and someone else on another path made a decision that suddenly and without warning impacted her path?  Accidents do happen.  The guides can see but they can’t move people around like pieces on a chess board and sometimes collisions happen.  And lastly, what would have happened if the guides had actually said to this man, “Tell your wife to be careful while driving, she’s due to have a terrible accident.”  Would she have driven at all?  Or would she have been so freaked out that she decided to take the bus?  And for how long?  A day, a month, a year?  Telling someone that something terrible is about to happen to them can send someone to bed, hiding under the covers forever. 

Does that mean the guides can’t warn us if something terrible is about to befall us?  I have often received warnings for people, but that happens when the danger or problem is right around the corner or when it’s already happening and the sitter just isn’t aware of it yet.  For example, this has happened when someone was being stalked and her stalker found her but she didn’t know it yet.  It’s happened when a guy was about to be fired but didn’t know it.  And it’s happened when someone had a life threatening illness but wasn’t aware of it yet.  In those cases, the guides can see and report on something that is already in the process of happening.  That’s another good reason to get a reading.

Will a spirit guide always warn you about something bad in these cases?  They’ll only tell you if it will help you on your path.  Guides are concerned about your growth, and not necessarily about your comfort.  What if getting fired is the best thing for you and warning you would give you the opportunity to prevent it?  What if the next beating you get from your abusive boyfriend is the beating that causes you to leave the guy?  Would they want to prevent that?  Would they say, “Be careful not to burn the eggs or he’s going to bust your nose?” or would they allow it to happen because it’s for your own good?  It’s not for me to say or judge what information a guide gives me to pass along.  I’m just the conduit.

I know you want definitive answers from a reading, but that sometimes comes with a price and it’s usually powerlessness.  I read for a woman once and the guides told me she was in dire straits financially, and suggested she start looking for a job.  The woman confirmed for me that she was unemployed and had no intention of looking for a job even though her bills were piling up and she was in deep trouble.  So I had to ask her, “Why are you avoiding getting a job and taking care of yourself?”  To which she replied, “A psychic in California told me I was going to win the lottery and a prince from Europe was going to marry me, so why should I bother with getting a job?”  Even if this was true, (and it most certainly was not!), she gave all her power up to this “vision” of her future, deciding to just sit back and wait for it to happen.  What if the supposed prince was supposed to find her working at a job and instead she’s sitting at home waiting for him to call? 

The guides do not want to strip you of your power.  Sometimes knowing too much about your future causes you to stop taking the very actions that will ensure it.  So the guides have to be careful about what information they tell you and how it’s phrased.  Guides won’t lie to you, but it’s probable they aren’t telling you the whole story either as that would ruin your adventure.  What if you’re supposed to run into that jaguar because it teaches you courage.  If they tell you about the jaguar and you avoid it, they’ll just have to coerce a lion to attack you instead. 

So, what’s going to happen to you?  That’s your choice.  What does the path look like just ahead of you?   What tools do you need to better prepare yourself to meet what’s on your path?  What aren’t you aware of that could be negatively impacting your path?   Are you currently on a path that has the capability of leading to a desired goal or are you going entirely in the wrong direction?  All good questions to ask your guides.

Your guides are here to help you navigate your way through the forest of life, not to fight your battles or make your decisions for you.  They are the map, but you are the explorer.  Be prepared, stay sharp, and consult your map every once in a while to make sure you are where you think you are and are going where you think you’re going.  Life is easier when you consult the map.  But even that’s a choice.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Answer:  It takes time, practice, and discernment to know when you’re in contact with your higher self or just your imagination, or even another entity masquerading, as you say, as your higher self.  Until you have a solid grasp on your higher self’s energy and can instantly connect with and recognize it, you’re going to have to go through a process to ensure you’re making a proper connection.  Here are some ways you can make sure you’re connecting with your higher self and not somebody else.  The same is true for your spirit guides as well.

Raise your vibration
What state are you in?  Are you feeling loved, blessed, joyful, and grateful?  Good.  That’s where you want to be ideally when you commune with your higher self.  If you’re feeling fear, anxiety, anger, sadness, shame or guilt, it’s going to be harder to reach the frequency you need to be on to accurately connect with and hear your higher self communicating with you.  You don’t want to end up on a low frequency.  So before you begin, raise your vibration.  Watch a funny movie, tell someone you love them, give a homeless guy some money, go hug your kids, etc.  You don’t have to stay in this state forever, just get there before you connect.

Open your chakras
I really can’t stress enough how important it is to get your energetic body pumping and buzzing with balanced chakral energy.  Without opening your chakras, talking to your higher self is going to be like turning on a radio but pressing the mute button, and wondering why you can’t hear anything.  Boost the volume.  Open and spin your chakras from your root to your crown.  Feel the energy in those areas.  You can still connect with your higher self without opening your chakras, but it’s much harder and you have to listen that much more intently.  Give yourself a fighting chance and open those suckers up.

Find your sacred space
Next you want to create a sacred space where you and your higher self can meet without interruption.  In your mind, imagine going up into space either by climbing a long staircase, going up an escalator, flying, or taking a spaceship.  Doesn’t matter, just feel yourself climbing, going up as high as you can.  I like to walk up a staircase and breathe deeply while doing so.  Count while you climb.  When you feel like you’re high enough (this is you raising your frequency), create a space where you and your higher self can be alone.  It could be a garden, a white room, a living room, a temple, a cloud, etc.  Just enclose it in protective white light and indicate to all who are around that this is a private space for just you and your higher self (or guides).

Practice communicating
Now ask your higher self to come to you in this sacred, private space.  Your higher self will probably appear to look like you but that’s not always the case.  They are just energy – a frequency – and will present to you in a way that will make you most comfortable.  Start with the small stuff.  Offer your higher self a cookie and some tea, make small talk about the weather, just get a feel for each other.  Then ask your higher self what he or she most wants you to know.  Or ask him or her questions.  Have a conversation.  Try not to filter or evaluate the conversation while you’re having it.  Just have it.  You can always run it past your logic later.  The longer you talk the stronger the communication will become.  If you start questioning if you’re really talking to your higher self it might knock you out of this wonderful vibrational state you’ve gotten yourself into; it’s akin to accidentally pulling out the plug on your radio.  Connection over.  So just stay with it until you’ve got the information you want.

When you’re done communicating, thank your higher self, give him or her some love, and exit the sacred space.  Go back down into your body and close your chakras to a nice comfortable level.

Check the results
If you connected with something masquerading as your higher self you’re going to get information that will just feel wrong.  Entities who try to screw with you are seeking to put you in a state of fear so they can feed off of you.  They’ll tell you what to do, how to do it, when to do it and whom to do it with.  They will try to strip you of your power. 

If you’re really communicating with your higher self you’ll get encouragement and advice, and you’ll be challenged to make your own decisions.  You’ll also feel like you’re talking to your true self.  There will be love, not judgment.  There will be compassion and empathy, not anger. 

See what happens when you commune with your higher self.  If you like the results and are feeling more and more empowered, you’re on the right track.

Keep going back
Once you’ve connected with your higher self’s energy, it will be easier to find it again.  Keep going to that sacred space.  There will also come a point where you can access your higher self’s energy even if you’re feeling sad or scared because you’ll know what he or she feels like and can discern their true energy from others masquerading as your higher self.  You’ll get to a point where you can talk to your higher self in line at the grocery store, on a date, or on the phone with your mother. 

Your higher self wants to be known to you.  He or she is there to help guide you and keep you on track.  Your higher self is your heart, mind, and moral compass.  Get to know him or her and you’ll know yourself much better. 

Here’s to the beginning of a beautiful, empowering relationship!

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Question: What do you think about Indigo children?
Answer:  I’m not big on the whole label thing.  Crystal, indigo, purple, polka dots, plaid, it’s all the same to me.  Some children are pre-wired to be more aware and connected to their higher selves, and some aren’t.  Some kids are incarnating with specific missions and specific purposes that will have a global impact.  But you know what?  They’ve been doing that for eons.  Now we have a pretty label.  If you need to categorize your child, that’s your choice. 

Question:  Do you believe in astrology or horoscopes?
Answer:  I am not an expert at astrology and I haven’t investigated it enough to comment on whether I think it is real or not.  I suggest you talk to astrology experts and get their take on astrology.  I’m a Cancer with Libra rising and a Virgo moon, though.  If anyone knows what that means, contact me.

Question:  If I have to have an abortion to save my life, is that a sin?
Answer:  No.

Question:  Is levitation possible?  If so, do you know how I can do it or who I can learn from?  Have you ever done it?
Answer:  I have never levitated.  Like you I’ve heard tales of this ability.  I would start with the people who claim to be able to do it and go from there.  Report back when you find out something.

Question:  How can I use the law of attraction and the law of detachment at the same time without canceling each other out?
Answer:  With the law of attraction you want to get clear on your intention and become a vibrational match for it.  The law of detachment is about not being attached to a certain outcome.  Think of the story of the man in the flood who is sitting on his roof waiting to be rescued.  He wants to be rescued and thinks God is going to save him.  People come in a boat and helicopter to save him but he resists their attempts and says, “No no, it’s okay.  God will save me.”  When he gets to Heaven he complains and God says, “I sent you a boat and a helicopter.  What more did you want?”  The man was a vibrational match for being rescued but he was attached to that manifesting a certain way (e.g. the mighty hand of God).  Cast your intention out upon the water and let the universe decide how best to manifest the details.  You might be getting what you asked for and not even be noticing it.

Question:  Do you think climate change will be a huge problem people have to deal with in the future?
Answer:  Sure.  Climates change, people adapt.  If you want to know more about this, consult a professional in the field.

Question:  Are we ever going to be finished incarnating?  When does it stop?
Answer:  When you no longer choose to “play the game” it stops.  Every incarnation is your choice.  Every time you come here, you learn.

Question:  Can spirit guides or angels contact you in “human” form?
Answer:  I have never experienced this so I can’t say for sure, but I think that in a severe situation an angel can take human form, but not a spirit guide.  I think it’s more likely, however, that they urge and nudge an already incarnated human to help you out when you’re in trouble.  Read Spirit Guides at Starbucks.

Question:  If I know something bad is going to happen to someone but they won’t listen to me, and it happens, am I somehow responsible?
Answer:  You are not responsible for anyone’s life.  Divest yourself of the idea that you can cause anyone to do anything.  People make their own choices.  Some may choose to listen to you and some won’t.  Having foreknowledge of an event means you can help them, but if they don’t want to listen, there’s nothing you can do.  Try not to feel guilty.  You did the best you could.

Question:  Can you affect physical reality while in a lucid dream?  Like turning on a television in a dream causes it to turn on in real life?
Answer:  No.  When you are lucid dreaming you are in the dream plane, the dream construct, which is inside your mind.  However, if you were astral instead of just in a lucid dream, then yes you could affect physical reality here on our plane.  Difficult but definitely possible.  Astral project responsibly, young man!

Question:  How can I get an astral sword like the one you made when you were younger and kicking demon butt?
Answer:  Visit my astral store.  Due to high demand we’ve just started stocking astral swords.  Just teasing.   Truthfully, you create your astral sword as an extension of your energy and intent.  You’ll need to use willpower and some of your astral essence to form it. 

Question:  Is it possible to recognize someone in this life as someone you knew in a past life?
Answer:  Absolutely.  Souls can recognize each other.  It’s a beautiful thing really.  How will you know?  You’ll just know.  You may not know who they were to you but that’s not as important as recognizing them.  Er, unless you’ve got some karma to work out with them and then you should watch your back.

Question:  What is my higher self doing while I’m in this incarnation?
Answer:  Watching, guiding, helping, and maybe chortling a little bit.

Question:  How can you claim to be psychic when everyone knows all psychics are frauds?
Answer:  You again?  I thought I got rid of you in my last Quick Answers to Quick Questions.

Question:  I need to contact my deceased father.  Can you help?
Answer:  Yes, book a reading.
Question:  Is my mom okay?  She died recently.
Answer:  I’m sure she’s fine, but if you want to communicate with her through me you can book a reading.
Question:  Can you tell my dad on the other side I love him?
Answer:  You can tell him yourself.  He will hear you more strongly than me because of your connection with him.
Question:  My dog recently crossed over.  Did he make it?
Answer:  I’m sure he’s fine but if you want you can book a reading with me and we’ll find out together.
Question:  If I book a reading with you, will you be able to connect me with my deceased (mother, father, sister, aunt, uncle, cousin, pet?)
Answer:  I’ll try.  No guarantee they will come through.  But we’ll give it a shot.

Question:  Do you need my birth date and the location where I was born to do my reading?
Answer:  Not remotely.  I don’t even need to know your name.  I just need your voice and a photo (or to be in person with you).  I connect through the energy of your voice or body.  During a reading you can ask about other family members and I do not need their photo or their voice as I will already be connected to YOUR guides.  But photos help me tune in and you’ll get a lot more information if you send me a photo of everyone you want to ask about.

Question:  Can you tell during a reading if my spouse is cheating on me?
Answer:  I’ve noticed the guides have a tendency to not want to reveal concealed information.  It’s there for a reason.  You may need to take action to discover it on your own.  But often they will tell my sitters if they have good reason to suspect something like that is going on.

Question:  I don’t want to have kids.  Is that alright?
Answer:  Yes.  Knowing what you want in life is really important.  If you don’t want children you shouldn’t have any.  You’re not broken.

Question:  I really want to talk to my deceased mother.  How would I go about doing that and knowing it’s real?
Answer:  When we know the person it can be hard to get validation.  That’s why mediumship is so great.  If you go to a medium and they are able to tell you something they couldn’t possibly have known, you get your validation.  When we’re trying to tune in to our own deceased relatives, that’s much harder.  You are the only one who can determine if the energy you’re feeling is really them or not.  For me, I rely on “the dreams.”  These are the ones where you just know their consciousness is really there communicating with you.

Question:  I don’t believe in lucid dreaming.  It just doesn’t seem possible to be awake in a dream.  Can you prove it’s real?
Answer:  I find this question so odd I don’t even know how to answer it.  It’s like asking me if peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are real.  Go have one for yourself and you’ll have your answer.  Until then, I wouldn’t go around telling people you don’t believe in lucid dreaming.  It just makes you look dumb.

Question:  Can you tell me who the spirit is who is throwing stuff at me in my trailer?
Answer:  Book a reading.

Question:  Is there a reason psychics tend to work independently of each other?  Is it jealousy?
Answer:  Another odd question.  That’s like asking why three surgeons aren’t performing your appendectomy at the same time.  You only need one psychic if they’re good.  Remember that different psychics have different specialties, though, so find one that specializes in the way you need.  Just like you wouldn’t ask your podiatrist to perform heart surgery, so too you shouldn’t go to a medium if you want career advice, and you shouldn’t go to an astrologer if you want to communicate with your deceased mother.

Question:  Why do you charge so much for readings?  You can still make a good living if you charged only 30% as much as you currently do.
Answer:  My prices are based on value and demand.  If I cut the reading price to 30% of what it is now, my waiting list would seriously be a year long.  Can you imagine needing a reading today and having to wait a year to get it?  The most popular psychic mediums have waiting lists that span 3-5 years!  There are plenty of psychics in the sea.  Find one in your price range.  If you feel a specific psychic is what you want, pay them their asking price.  If they’re able to charge so much and still get tons of business, chances are they’re worth their price.  You get what you pay for and quality counts.

Question:  Is Bigfoot real?
Answer:   I have no knowledge in this area.  But if you see him, let me know.

Question:  Will my boyfriend marry me and will my family be well off financially?
Answer:  Book a reading.  The short answer, though, is that if you want something you’re responsible for making it happen.

Question:  Can you help me find my missing Ipod, camera, wedding ring, cat, etc…?
Answer:  First you need to know why it got lost in the first place.  What lesson are you being taught?  Or you need to learn how to keep track of your things better.  Seriously, I don’t find missing objects.  But there are psychics who specialize in this area.  If it were me, I’d start with logic, then move on to intuition, and then prayer.  One of them will probably work.

Question:  Do you believe in aliens, abductions, UFO’s and all that sort of thing?
Answer:  I want to answer this question very badly but the time is not right and there’s a chip in my head preventing me.  Someone help me.

Question:  How do I know if my loved one crossed over?
Answer:  Book a reading.  Most of the deceased people I’ve been in contact with are fully crossed over, but I do sometimes encounter someone who is resisting that.  Usually in the case of suicide.  If I can get them “on the line” so to speak then we’ll know for sure.

Question:  My soul mate died recently and I have not felt her energy since she crossed over.  I am so sad over her loss and was expecting to feel her around me a lot since I’m very open to that sort of thing.  Where is she?  Is she lost?
Answer:  When we cross over we aren’t automatically able to project our energy back to this physical frequency so easily.  It takes skill, time, and patience.  I’ve seen guides bring through recently deceased people because they can’t come through on their own just yet.  And I’ve also encountered extremely strong spirits who can easily communicate with me shortly after they’ve died.  Give it some time.  Send her love energy.  She’s not likely lost.

Well that’s it for now folks.  Feels good to clear out some of those questions!  If you have a question that hasn’t already been answered, feel free to submit it.  Remember that Ask Erin questions are answered publicly, not privately, and there’s no guarantee your question will be chosen.  The best way to get an answer is to send a short question whose answer will benefit many.  If you really need to hear from me directly, use my Contact Form or book a reading.  Current wait times are 3-5 weeks.

Be at peace.  Be kind.  Express love.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

First, I announced on my blog that I was developing my psychic abilities to a point where I could actually begin doing readings for people.  I blogged about my awakening and my experience on the Criss Angel MindFreak show.  I was off and running, I was happy, congruent, and really proud of myself.  At the same time this was happening, I was still running my online magazine, VegFamily.  I was also doing web consulting and programming, and I had an independent publishing company.  I announced on VegFamily that I was a psychic medium and that if anyone wanted a reading, to go to my new site.  This was the beginning of the end of my naiveté.

I immediately got a bunch of nasty emails from readers who told me I was doing the devil’s work, and that the Bible expressly prohibited them from interacting with me in any way, shape, or form.  They told me they were going to stop reading the magazine, even though they’d been loyal readers for years and found the information great.  That surprised me. 

Then I got an email from a woman who had contributed several articles to the site over the years – a  woman I had exchanged many pleasant emails with – who asked me to remove all of her articles from the site because I was going against the Lord and working for Satan.  I wrote back to her for clarification since I had no awareness of what she was talking about.  She sent back a lot of quoted scripture and there is indeed a passage in the Bible that says you’re not supposed to truck with mediums and you should stone them on sight.  I’m glad she lived in another state.   I got into it with her for a few exchanges because I wanted to sincerely understand how she could be my friend one day and the next want to shun me. For her, what it came down to was that she was a devout follower of the Bible and the Bible expressly stated to her that she could not have any contact with me.  I wished her well in her life and we parted ways permanently.  I think what shocked me most was that I felt I was being unfairly and harshly judged by vegans, who were no strangers to harsh judgment from family, friends, and society.   Shouldn’t they have known better?

Next, a couple of my web clients stopped doing business with me because I was a psychic.  And some members of the vegan community with whom I’d been doing business suddenly stopped responding to my emails.  None of them called me devil-spawn, they just drifted away or gave me the cold shoulder.  So coming out publicly as a psychic negatively impacted my businesses and to some extent my income. 

Then there were the friends.  I don’t have many religious friends so I wasn’t expecting any kind of negative response from them regarding my new profession.  I was wrong though.  There was a new problem to contend with.  It took me a while to figure out why some of my friends and acquaintances were treating me so coldly.  I found out quite by accident that they were wondering why I’d turned to a life of crime.  Yes, crime!  Apparently, and I’m not sure you’re aware of this, all psychics are frauds, charlatans, and criminals who prey on people who are gullible enough to think that psychic abilities and talking to dead people is even possible.  Yes, that’s right.  These people thought I was actually, and quite deliberately, turning to a life of crime.  I can’t blame them for not wanting to associate with a criminal, except for one problem, I wasn’t a criminal!  This actually hurt me a lot more than the religious issue.  I’m used to some religious people turning a blind eye to their own intuition in favor of what’s fed to them via holy scripture.  I’m not used to being thought of as a criminal though.  That took some time for me to digest.  Rather than try to understand how I was developing my psychic abilities, they found it much more believable that I had simply decided to rip people off.  Some friends, right?  I recall one day asking one of my friends if he thought I was fraudulently ripping people off and he said, “I know you believe you’re psychic, and I know you’re not trying to rip people off, but everyone knows psychic abilities aren’t real so I think you’re probably deluded but not intentionally trying to hurt anyone.”  Gee, thanks.  Over the years he’s really come around, though, and thinks I just have an uncanny ability to accurately name people’s dead relatives and tell people what they do for a living without them telling me first.  He uses words like “lucky guess” and “coincidence” a lot.

I started to have concerns about even calling myself a psychic because of all the negative connotations built into the group.  To be fair, there really are a lot of frauds, charlatans, and criminals in this industry, and that’s a real shame, but let’s not throw the baby out with the bath water.  Not everyone who claims to be psychic is a criminal or fraud.  It reminds me of when I joined a sorority and my non-sorority friends thought that all sorority girls were vapid sluts only interested in hair, make-up and the size of frat boy bulges.  Lordy, people. 

So, long story short, I lost a lot of friends and apparently credibility when I came out as a psychic.  It wasn’t all bad though.  There were some unexpected positives.

My family has been incredibly supportive and proud of my work as a psychic medium.  My dad is so cute, he tells everyone about his psychic daughter.  He carries my cards around with him and gives them to everyone: the dental hygienist, the mail carrier, his business contacts, and friends.  In fact, my mom had to tell him to tone it down a bit as they came to find what I found, that some of these people thought I was a criminal too.  I think my dad was just as surprised to find this out as I was.  They started having uncomfortable situations with their own friends when my name was brought up. 

My sister has run into this problem too when she tells her friends that she has a psychic sister.  They all want to know why I haven’t won the lottery yet.  So for some, it’s just purely the fact that they know nothing about how psychic abilities work that cause them to suspect I am being less than honest.  I think the fact that my family has known about my psychic gifts for my entire life has helped them see that becoming a professional psychic was a natural progression for me.  They know I’m not a criminal or fraud and it’s hard for them understand why others think I am.

My aunt and cousin are also exceptionally supportive of me.  Sometimes when I’m in Los Angeles I do my in-person readings in their home.  Steve’s family has also been supportive.  I was concerned as they are very religious, but apparently their priest told them it was okay as I am using my gift to help others and because I believe my gift comes from God/Source, as I wrote about in my blog entry, But Where’s the Love?

I told Steve at one point that coming out publicly as a psychic medium must be somewhat similar to how homosexuals feel when they come out publicly.  You have to deal with and accept the fact that some people will shun you because of their beliefs about your “group.”  I have great compassion and respect for people who proudly share their real selves with the world, knowing it will probably create a disconnect with some people in their lives.  But it is only by fully sharing who we really are that we can begin to bring down the walls of preconception and challenge people to get to know us before deciding what we are.

If you are a fellow psychic, what has been your experience of coming out publicly?  Or do you only tell certain people?  What reactions have you received, and how have you dealt with any negative judgment?  If you’ve come out as a homosexual or anything that is sometimes perceived as an abomination or against the Bible or social norms, what has been your experience?  What words of wisdom can you share with others who are considering coming out?

All I can say is that coming out of my own closet was really eye-opening for me.  I discovered that even intelligent people can make assumptions that are not based on personal observation but just on preconceived ideas about a group.  This is wrong.  It’s wrong for all of us.  Guard against this at all costs as it’s very damaging to society as a whole.

To the budding young psychics out there who are considering becoming a professional psychic, know going into this that you may lose some friends, that some people who claim to love you may disconnect from you.  But if your heart is aligned with this truth you have nothing to be ashamed of.  Let people have their reactions, let them walk their own path, but don’t hide who you are.  We can’t change people’s beliefs about psychics by staying hidden or underground.  Be honest and forthright in all your dealings.  Perhaps in time we can repair our damaged reputation, and help people see we are truly aligned with love.  Even with all the negativity, the loss of friends, the damaged relationships, the harsh and critical emails from total strangers, I wouldn’t trade my path for anything.  It’s been an incredibly rich and rewarding journey, really a dream come true.

Now where did I put that broom?  I’ve got some flying to do.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

You see, when you meditate to the point where your mind is totally silent, you’re actually blocking communication with your guides.  It’s like they look down and say, “Shh, she’s meditating.  Everyone be quiet.”  It’s like putting a Do Not Disturb sign on your door.  They respect your space, your silence.

There’s nothing wrong with meditating to find your center, in total peace and quiet, with your mind totally blank, but it’s not a good tool for communication with your guides.  The goal is not to quiet your mind but to open it, to expand it, to prepare it to receive higher frequency communication.  But what of stray thoughts that threaten to derail you?  We’ll take care of those nasty buggers in a minute.

When you first begin meditating it’s quite common for unwanted thoughts to enter your mind.  “Did I feed the cat yet?”  “How am I going to get that proposal done by tomorrow?”  “I think I’ll make tofu tonight for dinner.”  And on and on it goes.  It’s like you’ve got a personal secretary in your mind running through your To Do list.  The goal is to move past these thoughts, to give your mind something else to think about.

Guided meditation is the way to achieve this.  With a guided meditation you are focusing your mind instead of quieting it.  You’re focusing on raising your vibration so you no longer hear the chatter of your day to day concerns.   You leave the ego behind and step into your super consciousness.

A guided meditation is usually sort of allegorical.  “You’re walking along a beach and you see a sea shell.  You hold it up to your ear and you can hear the whooshing sounds of the ocean.  You lay down on the warm sand and feel the heat of the sun on your body.  You look out upon the glistening waves crashing on the shore.  You smell the salt in the air.”  What this does is to get you out of your daily thoughts and into your sensory thoughts.  From there, it’s a short step to connecting with conscious energies, also known as, your guides.

You can buy a guided meditation CD, download one onto your Ipod, or you can have a partner guide you through the meditation.  You can even guide yourself.  Put on some relaxation or meditation music and guide yourself through a scene.  Maybe you’re in a garden examining the foliage and flowers with all your senses.  Maybe you’re walking through a forest when you come upon a cottage.  Or maybe you’re flying through the sky with an eagle as your guide.  The sky’s the limit, really, since this is all happening in your mind.

Once you’ve successfully disconnected from your ego and the day to day task list, it’s time to invite your guides to come speak with you.  Find a comfy spot in your “world” and invite them to come sit with you.  Maybe one guide will show up, maybe five will come.  Maybe you’ll see an animal, or maybe you’ll see a deceased relative.  Maybe your higher self will show up or maybe your 5-year-old self will make an appearance.  Start chatting.

Yes, at first it’s going to feel like you’re talking to yourself.  That’s fine.  Just keep going.  “Imagine” the whole conversation if that’s the frame you need to have.  As you keep going, though, I think you’ll find that the communication gets deeper and stronger.  Soon, what they are saying to you will not feel like it’s coming from your own mind, but someone else’s.  Maintain the connection as long as you can.  When you’re done, say goodbye, and slowly bring your mind back to the present. 

I personally love guided meditations, especially when someone else is guiding me through them.  I can just free my mind instead of being a slave to my daily thoughts.

Give it a try on your own and see what results you get.  At the very least you’ll be relaxed and vibrating at a higher frequency than before.  At best, you’ll get wisdom and insights from your guides that will help you navigate your way through your life maze.  Keep trying different methods until you find the one that works best for you.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

You can do both and they will hear you both ways.  When you think a thought, it creates energy.  That energy can be received and understood by guides, angels, higher selves, God, anything with a consciousness.  You can cast your thought to one specific energy, like your higher self, or you can cast your thought out to the Universe, like, “I am ready for love, Universe.  Bring it on!”

A lot of people think they need to be in a specific building, praying to God in a certain way.  That works, but it’s not necessary to be in a building, on a certain day, praying in a certain way.  Our guides on the other side can hear our thoughts whenever we think them. 

If you want to hear them back, that’s another story.  They don’t communicate using vocal chords and mouths to your ears.  They will respond energetically, the same way they received your communication.  So if you’re not able to tune in to their frequency, you won’t hear their message. 

But there are other ways of receiving their response or communication.  For one, you may get an image in your head, a form of clairvoyance.  You may hear a thought come back to you like, “Yes, my child, you are indeed loved.”  That’s clairaudience.  You may get a warm tingly feeling in your stomach or chills up your back.  That’s clairsentience.  Alternatively, you may get signs, symbols or synchronicities in your life, which is their way of letting you know they received your message.  Interpreting them isn’t always easy, but you do the best you can.  You can consult an intuitive, someone whose job it is to receive energy from the other side and interpret it for you.  These people, such as myself, have trained themselves to receive and interpret communication from the other side.

Who should you address yourself to?

If you need help immediately, like your life is in danger, call upon the angels.  Specifically, Archangel Michael would be a good choice.  If you need healing, call on Raphael.  If you want to commune with God, Source, Oneness, Love, direct your thoughts to your version of God.  If you want to make something happen in your life, like you want to change careers or find a new relationship, I would address yourself to your spirit guides.  If you want to remember who you really are and consult with the highest version of yourself, talk to your higher self.  If you’re curious about what it’s like on other planets or in other dimensions, ask a high vibration celestial being to communicate with you.  If you’re, uh, more attracted to the dark side, you can ask for a low vibration being to assist you.  I’d watch out for that though.  They don’t always play fair.

How do you talk to them?

Some people use meditation.  Quiet your mind, open your chakras, breathe deeply, and ask them to appear to you in your mind.  Talk to them telepathically and see what they say.

Some people like ritual.  Light some candles, turn on the fountain, add some relaxation music, chant, hum, sing; however you feel like connecting, connect. 

Some people like prayer.  Sit quietly or kneel, go into your heart and/or mind, and commune silently with your God.

Some people do well with journaling or automatic writing.  I especially recommend this technique for the left-brained folks who don’t go in for the woo-woo stuff.  Just write down some questions in a Word document, and type back the answer you see, feel, hear, or just know.  Or the answers you think you just saw, heard, felt, or knew.  Rationalize it later.

You can communicate with the other side in dreams too.  This was a method I preferred growing up.  I would program a dream or ask for a message dream on a certain night and pay close attention to what my dreams were about.  If I got myself a lucid dream, I was good to go!

There are many ways to communicate with the beings in the ether.  Try different methods until you find the one you like best.

How do you know if your guides are communicating with you or if you’re just hearing things or making things up?

Practice for one thing.  Keep communicating and acting on what you get.  See if it turns out like you thought it would.  That will strengthen your communication.  I also find that the deeper into meditation I go, the stronger the connection.  You want to get yourself to the point where you can discern the difference between your ego, logic, intuition, and guides.  It’s not likely going to happen on your first attempt unless you’re already a pretty advanced intuitive and just didn’t know it.

You can talk to your higher self, guides, angels, and God out loud with your voice if you want.  That sends the same energy as doing it in your mind.  Sometimes it feels better to hear your prayer out loud.  You can put some oomph and inflection into it. 

Knowing that the Universe receives your thoughts and wishes, I encourage you to send love and gratitude out whenever you can.  That tends to be returned in kind.  And I encourage you to watch the negative thinking as you don’t want to accidentally manifest something unfortunate for yourself.  The universe responds to our thoughts. Guard yours well or they will become your destiny.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Then do the deceased always speak English to me?  In a way, yes, and in a way, no.  Sometimes I do hear phrases word for word in my native language which is English.  I will hear a deceased person give me a certain phrase and I know I’m supposed to repeat it just that way because there is a significance to that phrase and to paraphrase would not be best.  So I repeat it the way I heard it.  Other times I just get thoughts and feelings and I have to translate their meaning.  For example, I might suddenly get a pain in my head while asking the deceased person how they died.  So then I’ll know there was either a stroke, head injury, Alzheimer’s or maybe a shot to the head.  Usually I can sense which one even if they don’t actually say, “Tell her I was shot in the head,” or “I died of a stroke.”  It sort of feels like I get a download of information and all I have to do is open the file and start reading.  Sometimes they put a song in my head and it turns out that the song has meaning.  Other times I just see an image, like of a birthday cake and a number, or a symbol like a fleur de lis or a question mark.  But a full thought usually comes with it.

The same non-verbal communication happens with animals.  On the occasions when I’ve connected with an animal who has crossed over, I get specific information from them, just like I do with deceased humans.  Obviously animals don’t speak English, so I must be getting the information through thoughts, images, and feelings.  Sometimes the animal shows me what they looked like.  That’s easy because then I just have to describe it.  One time I sat down in a woman’s chair and I immediately felt the presence of a very territorial cat sitting on top of the back of the chair where my head was.  When I tuned in I saw an orange cat with a smooshed in face (it seemed almost flat).  When I told her what I was getting she confirmed that her orange cat used to sit in that very spot (that was HIS spot!) and that his face was smooshed and they actually named him “Smoosh” because of it.  I almost had to move to a different location because this cat’s energy was so strong and territorial that I felt like I was intruding.  

Mainly animals convey love and connection and that they are still there and waiting for their loved ones to cross over.  They often also show me their replacements.  One time I was tuned in to a big calico cat who then showed me an image of a black kitten.  My sitter confirmed that his calico cat had died that year and that he had just gotten a new black kitten.  The calico wanted to convey that it was okay to replace him.  My sitter was very grateful to hear that because it was something that concerned him. 

Communication with the other side is energetic, not verbal.  Tune in to your own deceased relatives and see if you can sense their feelings or thoughts.  It might be too difficult for them to say, “Hey Julie, I’m here, I’m doing well, and will you please stop dating that jerk?”  Instead they may just be able to send a feeling, perhaps one of love, concern, or peace.  Dreams are the number one way in which spirits try to communicate with the living.  Be open to different modalities and it will increase your chance of making a connection with the other side.

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.

Answer:  When I’m doing an intuitive reading, the energy of my sitters definitely affects my ability to read for them.

The easiest readings for me are when my sitter is in a state of love, peace, excitement, and joy.  And people who have developed their psychic abilities and who know how to raise their vibration consciously are great too.  To use an analogy, it’s like the book is open and I am speed reading.  I could read dozens of pages about them and just keep right on going.  The reason is because they are boosting my signal.  It’s like making a cell phone call and someone is boosting my signal so everything comes in very clearly and easily.  I can clearly hear and see what their guides are telling me.

In the middle are people who have lower energy but who are wanting a good reading and are open to the information coming through.  So these would be people who are depressed, suicidal, fearful, anxious, sad, etc.  To go back to the analogy, the book is open, the light is good, and I can read a few pages.  It’s harder to turn the pages, but I can do it.  In this case, my cell phone is working normally with patches of static periodically.  They are not boosting my signal, but they are not blocking it either.

The category that’s toughest are people who are purposely holding back, who don’t want to be read, who are afraid I’ll discover a deep dark secret, or people who are skeptical or cynical.  In this case, I’ve been handed their book, but they turn the lights out, so it’s like trying to read in the dark.  I can still read, but reading in the dark is much harder than reading in the light.  And often, it’s like they are jamming my cell phone signal.  Again, my cell phone works fine, but the signal is jammed.  It can be frustrating for both of us.

You might wonder why people in the last category bother signing up for a reading.  Many of them want the answer to one single question, but they are not open to any other information coming through.  I have people who sign up for readings who simply want to invade the privacy of their partner and are trying to use the reading to get information about what their partner is doing and who he’s doing it with so they can confront him on it.  Some people just want to know when they are going to win the lottery.  This is absolutely not how readings with me work.  The very first thing I do is connect with your guides and ask them what they most want to tell you to help you on your life path.  We go over career, relationships, health, finances, spirituality, and whatever else you want to ask.  But the guides take the opportunity to share insights with you that are designed to help you get what you most wanted out of life, and to help you achieve true happiness.

Remember that all psychics work a little differently.  My specialty seems to be helping people with their life paths and life purpose.  Unless your guides think it’s in your highest interest to give you lottery numbers, you won’t get them from a reading with me.  If your guides want you to trust your own instincts, they probably won’t tell you if your spouse is cheating on you, but they might tell you that you have reason to be concerned, or they might help you with another aspect of your relationship that will serve you better.

My energy also affects a reading.  If I’m not feeling well it’s difficult for me to connect, so when I’m sick I usually reschedule my readings for the day, especially if I have a fever or a headache.  It’s analogous to having a low battery in my cell phone, it could die at any moment.  Likewise, I need to be fully present, ego out of the way, at my highest vibration in order to do readings properly, so if I’m distracted or emotionally upset then it’s difficult for me to connect with your guides.  This is why I do a meditation before each reading so that I can turn off my own thoughts and be open to the connection with Bob (my conduit guide), and your guides. 

So yes, energy states matter quite a bit.  Good question!

© 2009 by Erin Pavlina.