The Dead Zone: How do I get a message to my deceased loved one?

One of the top questions people have asked me over the years is how to communicate with their deceased loved ones (DLO’s for short). How do we get messages to those who have crossed over, and how do we know they even receive the messages?

Here are the ways I suggest communication with your DLOs on the other side:

Meditation
Meditation clears your mind and prepares you to be able to communicate more effectively. It’s like removing the static on a call. There are many ways to meditate, and you should choose the method you’re most comfortable with. Some people quiet their minds, some clear their chakras first, some walk up a long celestial staircase in their mind’s eye, some pull in thoughts of love and gratitude, some sit in a garden. Once your mind is clear and you are in a peaceful meditative state, you can send thoughts or even have conversations with your deceased loved ones more easily.

Prayer
With prayer you are casting your thoughts and energy at your dearly departed. Tell them how you feel, tell them you love them, tell them how you desire contact. Ask for them to be with you, ask for them to hear you, ask for them to send you signs and signals of their presence. Use your conscious thoughts to send messages to them. They will receive them.

Create a signal
A very effective way to let your DLOs know you desire to speak with them is to create a signal so they know that every time you activate the signal you are trying to reach them. Ideas include lighting a very specific candle that you only light when you want to communicate with them, lighting a certain incense, sitting in a certain chair, playing a certain song. Pick whatever you desire, just make sure you only use it when you want to communicate. Over time the signal will become stronger and stronger because you’re infusing your energy into it and they are training themselves to notice that specific sign.

Hold an object
A lot of people find success by holding an object that used to belong to the DLO. Find something that might still have their energy in it. A piece of jewelry, some clothing, a gift given to you by the DLO. Hold it in your hands, get your mind clear with some meditation, light a candle or initiate your signal, and start sending. When you’re done, put the object away. Try to put it in a container instead of letting it mingle about with your other possessions. That will keep the energy engaged longer.

Lucid dreaming
One of my favorites ways to send messages to a DLO is in a lucid dream. Deceased people often try to reach you in your dreams. Dreams are a sort of midpoint for a meeting. They can more easily reach you and you can do the same. Use your dreams to call out to your DLO and ask them to come to you. There’s a very high chance you will be able to make contact in a dream. Read my article, Are Dreams About Deceased Loved Ones Real? for more information on this topic.

Write them a letter
I know some people who hate meditation and don’t remember their dreams. They will write their loved one a note or a letter. The act of focusing your intention and will on writing your thoughts will help them receive it. Start a communication journal or just write a note on a slip of paper. Infuse your writing with feelings of love and gratitude. This is also a great method if you want to save your communication. Put the letters in a notebook or box or scrapbook and re-read them later.

Create consistency
The key with this type of communication is to create consistency. If you sometimes talk to them from your car, and sometimes in a dream, and sometimes you light a candle and sometimes you don’t, you can still make contact, but if you can create consistency you will increase your chances tremendously. Connect at the same time, in the same place, using the same method or the same object, and you’ll have much greater success with this.

Do they hear you? How do you know?
The most important thing to know about communicating with your DLOs is that they CAN receive your messages. It’s true that some of them are more tuned in to us than others. For example a person who has recently died will be more tuned in than someone who died 40 years ago. A person who died unexpectedly will be more tuned in than someone who slipped easily and peacefully into death. And if there was a tremendous amount of love between you, communication will be more likely.

But keep communicating. Keep sending. They will get the message.

In addition, you’ll know they received your message by how you feel after you’re done communicating. Some people feel a sense of relief, some get chills down their spine while they’re communicating. Some will even hear their DLO talk back to them. You may get a sign or signal afterward, like their favorite song comes on the radio, or their picture flops to the floor. Or you might suddenly smell their scent. Signs can come in all sorts of ways.

Your loved ones are only a thought away. Keep sending love and gratitude to them and you will begin to feel them sending love back.

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