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How To Become a Vibrational Match for Your Desire

You’ve probably heard proponents of the Law of Attraction tell you that you must be a vibrational match for your desire in order to attract it. But what does that mean?

The law of attraction is the belief that what you think about you bring about. Your thoughts create your reality. You attract what you think about and that which you affirm in your life. So if you’re thinking about how poor you are, you will continue to attract poverty. If you think about how lonely you are, you will continue to be alone.

If you think about being wealthy, you will attract wealth. But if you think about becoming wealthy you will attract lack. Why? Because if you are hoping to attract wealth you are affirming that you don’t currently have it. If you continue to think about not having wealth but wanting it, you will continue to not have wealth and want it. Do you understand why this is so?

Your thoughts have power.

Every thought you think goes out into the universe as though you are placing an order at a restaurant. You think it or feel it, and it is so. You order it, and it will come. This is why if you constantly feel like you are in a state of poverty you will notice that you are constantly in a state of poverty. If you go back and forth between feeling abundant and feeling impoverished, notice that you will see that same pattern in your life; sometimes you are ahead and sometimes you suffer a blow to your abundance. And if you find that wealth comes easily to you, notice that money flows into your life easily and you hardly have to think about it. The same is true for relationships, health, friendships, life experiences, etc. Whatever you create in yourself will come back into your reality. This is why it is so vital to understand what it means to become a vibrational match for your desire. If you are in vibrational harmony with your desire, it will manifest.

Read my free complete guide on raising your vibration to learn how to shift into being a vibrational match quickly.

A lot of people erroneously believe that wishing for something will make it so. When you wish for something, hope for something, or try to get something, you are affirming that you do not have it so the universe brings you more of the same. Instead you must know it, feel it, and believe it. You must have it first for it to come. So how can you have something you don’t have?


Decide what it is you want and start daydreaming about what your life will be like when you have it. Imagine you are stepping into an alternate reality where what you want is already in your possession. How do you act and behave? Where do you live? Who do you hang out with? How has having this desire changed your life. See your new life and your new self. See it vividly. What happens to you when you obtain the wealth or relationship or health of your dreams? Spend at least 10-30 minutes per day daydreaming about who you are and how your environment and habits change when you obtain your desire. After all, if you can’t even imagine it, how can you attract it?

Feel the Feeling

This is so vital I couldn’t put it in the daydream section. You absolutely must feel the feeling you will have when you obtain your desire. How do you feel when you long for something? Not how you feel when you have it, right? To be a vibrational match for your desire you must call up inside of you the feelings you will have when you’ve made your dream a reality. Will you feel safe and secure? Loved and cared for? Healthy and energetic? Feelings are thoughts too, so whatever you’re feeling is going out into the universe and coming back to you. Identify how you will feel when you obtain your desire and start feeling that way now. If you think you can’t feel something you don’t feel, you’re wrong. Actors can do it and so can you. You can choose your emotions any time you want. Try it and see. Experiment and practice until you are a master at it.

Remove Negative Energy

So you know what you want, you’re daydreaming about having it, and you’re feeling how you’ll feel when you get it. Then you start talking about it with friends. Some of them will be totally on board with your desire and their thoughts will even assist you in obtaining your desire. But some of the people around you will tell you that you can’t have what you want, or they’ll tell you that you’re not good enough, or capable enough or deserving enough to have it. Now you have thoughts working against you. I implore you to share your dreams and desires only with people that will support them. I can’t stress this enough. If they are not with you, they are against you. Choose carefully what energies you allow in your life. When you tell someone what you desire you are renting space in their vibrational field, so make sure they are in alignment with you achieving your desire.

Make Room in Your Life

Change your environment to support your desire. Want to be healthier? Remove the junk food from the house, or dedicate more space in your refrigerator for fresh produce. Want to be wealthier? Open a savings account so your money has a place to go when it arrives. Want to switch careers? Create a new file drawer for your new business or clear some space on the bookshelf for books related to your new career. Want a partner or companion? Make room in your bedroom (empty a drawer, get a king size bed, make room in the bathroom cabinet). You get the drift. If you send out an intention and the universe sees you have no room for it in your life, it will be delayed. Begin to make your environment ready to receive your desire.

Reframe Your Beliefs

“Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.” – Henry Ford. Your beliefs create your reality. Look at how you speak to yourself and about yourself. “I don’t have what it takes to be a millionaire.” “I just can’t lose the 30 pounds.” “Who would want to be with me?” Catch yourself. Every negative thought you have affirms that reality. You don’t want to lie to yourself though, because you’ll know you’re lying. So you may need to be creative in how you think your thoughts. For example:

“I’m so fat” becomes “Good health is coming my way at breakneck speed.”

“I’ve never made much money” becomes “People go from rags to riches all the time. If they can do it, I can do it.”

“I’m never going to find the man of my dreams” becomes “I am someone who does not settle for less than she is worth.”

You get the idea. There are many ways to express a thought. Make sure you’re expressing your inner thoughts in an empowering and positive way.

Create a New Identity

Without lying, is there a way for you to create a new identity that is more in alignment with your desire? Let’s say you want to switch careers from being a programmer to a writer. The next time someone asks you what you do for a living try saying, ‘I’m a writer.” If that’s not comfortable or if you haven’t written anything yet, say, “I’m a programmer transitioning to becoming a writer.” Try your new identity on for size. Let’s say you long for a child. If someone asks you if you’re a mom simply say, “I’m a mom-in-waiting.” Find a way to identify yourself in a truthful and honest way.

Make Sure You Really Want It

I think what trips most people up is saying they want something they don’t really want. Do you really want to lose weight? “Sure I want to be thin but not if it means I can’t have ice cream.” Do you really want a relationship? “Sure I want to meet the right guy, but I am really enjoying my freedom.” Do you really want to run your own business? “Sure I’d love to run my own business, but not if I have to work 12 hour days.” If you are doing everything right and you still don’t have your desire, consider that there is something about it that you don’t really want. There could be some aspect of it that you don’t feel ready to handle so you will unconsciously block yourself from having it. I see it all the time and am guilty of it myself. This is why the daydream is so important. Really imagine what it would be like to have your desire. If there is anything about the new reality you don’t like, change it, reframe it, or alter and refine your desire.

“I want to own my own business but have the freedom to travel whenever I want.” Put that into the daydream.

“I want to be in a loving relationship but still have the freedom to go where I want whenever I want.” Put that into the desire.

“I want to be thin and healthy while still enjoying the taste of my food.” See it, feel it, so you can have it.

Jump on Opportunities

Once you’ve identified what you really want and have become a vibrational match for it, make sure you take actions that support receiving it. Let me explain this concept using some dialogue.

Jane: I want to be in a loving, committed, healthy relationship.

Mary: That’s great! I didn’t know you were out looking for a guy. Where are you going to meet guys?

Jane: Oh well, I work so many hours that I don’t really have time to go to clubs or bars or meet ups.

Mary: Oh, well are you looking for a guy at work then?

Jane: No, none of the guys at work really appeal to me.

Mary: Are you looking online then?

Jane: Oh heavens, no. Those guys are all so desperate. Why can’t they get a date in person?

Mary: Well are you having your friends set you up?

Jane: A few.

Mary: Do they know what you want?

Jane: I think so. I mean, they would know not to set me up with a guy that’s lame.

Mary: Uh, yeah I guess. Have you a clear idea of what you’re looking for?

Jane: I’ll know him when I meet him.

Mary: Good luck with that, Jane.

Jane is not a vibrational match for her desire to be in a loving relationship nor is she taking appropriate action to indicate to the universe that she is serious. Here is how the conversation would likely go if she was.

Jane: I want to be in a loving, committed, healthy relationship.

Mary: That’s great! I didn’t know you were out looking for a guy. Where are you going to meet guys?

Jane: Well you know I love hiking so I joined a meet up group that hikes on the weekends. I also love dancing so I signed up for swing dancing lessons and am meeting some interesting fellows there.

Mary: That’s great! What about guys at work?

Jane: I haven’t really met anyone at work that I’m interested in, however I’ve told all my co-workers what I want in a guy and to feel free to set me up with anyone that matches my key attributes.

Mary: That’s great.

Jane: Yeah, and sometimes I just take my laptop to Starbucks and sit there and work. The longer I’m there, the more people I run into that seem interesting to me. And I always make sure I look my best when I’m grocery shopping.

Mary: What about trying online dating?

Jane: Yes, I have a profile set up on 2 dating sites right now. I made sure my profile clearly states what I’m looking for and what I’m not interested in. I also recently bought two tickets to my favorite play. I’m imagining an interesting guy sitting next to me that night. I can practically feel our hands touching already.

Mary: Sounds like you have your bases covered. I have no doubt you’ll attract someone appealing.

Jane: Me too. I’m super excited and can’t wait to meet him!

The Law of Attraction doesn’t work in a vacuum. Meet it halfway. Take every opportunity the universe sends you. Be on the lookout for openings and synchronicities.

The Bottom Line

The Law of Attraction really does work, but you’ve got to understand it and put all the pieces into play. Imagine going to a grocery store with a huge list of items you want, and you hand it to the grocer. He runs off and gets everything you want and comes back and says, “I’ve got all you want, but where’s your cart? How will you hold all these items? Why don’t you run off now and get a cart and come back when you’re ready to actually take these items. In the meantime, I’ll just hang on to them for you.” Go get your cart and start shopping.

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