If you have trouble motivating yourself to take action on a dream, goal, or task, I encourage you to find a challenge buddy. You may be thinking that a challenge buddy is like an accountability partner, but there is a difference. With an accountability partner (or group) you indicate what goal you’re trying to achieve and in what amount of time, and your group or partner holds you accountable.
A challenge buddy is someone who is well aware of your goals, and knows you fairly well, who will give YOU tasks you need to do that are in alignment with you achieving the goal they know you’re trying to achieve.
I’ll share an example from my own life to illustrate the role of a challenge buddy. I and a friend decided we would be challenge buddies. I knew what his goals were and he knew what mine were. So each morning we would check in with each other and I would give him three tasks he could choose from which, if he did them, would bring him closer to achieving his goal. He would do the same for me. At first we selected tasks that had to be done that day, but then realized some of the better tasks might take a few days to achieve. So we adjusted our strategy to work better for us.
An example of some challenges he gave me:
- Tell a good looking man that I found him attractive
- Do a weight workout that would concentrate on my upper body
- Park at the other end of a parking lot and walk to my destination
- Find a new musician whose music I like and add them to iTunes
He gave me those tasks because he knew me, my goals, my desires, and my challenges.
An example of some challenges I gave him:
- Tell one person at work in a sincere way that you think they’re doing a fantastic job
- Listen to a 10 minute meditation program
- Compliment 3 people at work on their appearance
- Give a long hug to someone you usually give a short hug to
He got those challenges because of what I knew he was working on.
None of the examples above are things we probably would have selected for ourselves. But having someone else “command” you to do them feels different than deciding to do it on your own. It’s a “for your own good” type of exercise.
Sometimes when you’re in your comfort zone you’re not even aware of it, and you need someone else to push you out a little.
We also gave each other tasks that would take a little longer to achieve, and the deal was that when you were done with a challenge you’d get a new one. If your buddy gives you a challenge you’re truly not comfortable with, you can decline. Having a challenge buddy requires trusting that your buddy knows you, knows your goals, and has your best interests at heart. And your buddy must be good at coming up with challenges that will truly push you to your goal.
Having people in your life that are proactively helping you achieve your goals is wonderful. I have a mastermind group too, which is a group I meet with twice a month. In the mastermind group, we express our intentions and the other members make sure we’re in alignment with that intention. If not, we alter the intention until the other members can sense we’re in alignment. If you’re not in alignment with your intention you won’t manifest it. Basic Law of Attraction 101.
Having an accountability group is good too. That’s when you express to your group what you’re working on and they hold you accountable. Being accountable often works with people who are motivated by fear of looking bad to peers. Knowing that if you fail in your task you’re going to have to face your accountability group is often the motivation you need to get your tasks done!
I recommend figuring out what works best for you. You might try a mastermind group, an accountability partner or group, or find a challenge buddy. Just like dieting with a friend or working out with a friend often leads to more success than doing those things alone, having people in your life to grow with does the same.
Find your challenge buddy today. It should be someone who knows you pretty well and is aware of your goals, fears, desires, and dreams. Together you can make huge leaps in your personal growth!