My passing was more peaceful than it looked.
You saw my body wracked with pain, my breathing interrupted with gasps for air, fear in my eyes as my organs shut down.
What you did not see was my soul slipping easily out of my vessel, and standing nearby taking in the scene.
I was not in my body when it stopped functioning, though it may have looked that way to you.
When my body lay there vacant, empty, and lifeless, I was standing beside you.
I was not gone, I was still there, but you could not see me, could not feel me, could not hear me saying “It’s okay. I’m okay. Really.”
After a few moments I felt a whooshing sensation in my soul, as memories came flooding back to me of who I really am and where I really come from.
I heard a sound, a high pitched whine, and a beautiful choral hum that promised deep connection with the universe.
The room filled with light, and I saw people that had passed before me, and beings of light and wisdom reaching out to take my hand.
I eagerly embraced them all, and then I was moving through space and through frequency.
It was an exhilarating ride. The sense of freedom I had was positively awesome. I was soaring through a matrix of energy, filling my cup with knowledge and memories as I moved.
And finally, landing in serenity, landing in love. I was being welcomed, Home.
Then I was given gifts.
My first gift was getting to see my life from hundreds of different perspectives. I saw those I wronged and felt remorse. I saw those I uplifted and I felt gratitude. I saw the times I was sad and the times I felt loved and cared for. I saw the times I stood lonely in a room full of people, and I saw joy in people I never knew I affected.
My second gift was reuniting with souls I knew before I went back to Earth and forgot. Such a joyous reunion. I was eager to share details from my most recent life and to hear about their experiences as well.
My third gift was remembering the unconditional loving embrace of Source, and stepping back into the collective energy of an unbreakable communion of souls. Now I was truly Home.
Eagerly I tuned back into my Earth family to tell you all I was fine – better than fine – but you were sad at your loss. I stood by you, sending you comforting thoughts, trying to explain that I was okay, that this wasn’t a time for grief, I was not really gone.
But you could not hear me.
So I wrapped my energetic arms around you and prayed you would feel some comfort. Please hear me. Please know that this is the natural way of things. You will see me again.
I know that you must go on without me there with you, and for that I am sorry. But please live the life of your dreams. I want to see you happy, I want to see you succeed at your goals. I want to see you love again.
Do not live in the loss. Live in the love that is still there between us.
I will check in on you as often as I can. I will watch over you and send you help when I see you need some.
And I will greet you at the gate when it is your time to pass.
Dearest family, I love you. Thank you for being on my life’s journey with me. Do not stop living because I am gone. Enjoy your life to the fullest, and I’ll see you when you get here.