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5 Reasons Your Life Isn’t Going The Way You Intended

I posted an article in September called, What is your Destiny?, where I discussed that we incarnate with an intention but not a destiny. In other words, you decide what you’d like to experience while incarnated but due to free will you don’t always manifest that intention.

A reader wrote to me and asked what causes us to veer off track, what makes us unable to reach the goals we pre-set for ourselves. It’s a good question so I wanted to answer in an article.

There are five things I can think of that will cause your life to go other than how you intended.

You Forget Your Intention
When you are born, the veil is drawn. This allows you to create and manifest a life for yourself without remembering everything that exists on the other side.

But wired into your spiritual DNA are your intentions. Whether your intention was to have a fun time exploring this world, or whether your intention was to help find a cure for some horrible disease, most people don’t consciously remember why they incarnated.

Half the fun of life is following the internal drive to get your destination, to see if you can remember, to see if you are driven to do what you wanted to do.

If you remembered everything, it would be like knowing how the magician does his tricks and the magic goes away. So one of the reasons you may not manifest your intention is because you’ve forgotten what it is.

You Don’t Hear Your Guides
Built into this system, however, are your spirit guides. These non-corporeal entities were assigned to you before you were born. They know your plan, they know your intention, and their job is to help you find it.

They use guidance, insight, nudges, synchronicities, signs, and signals to draw your attention to what your higher self wants you to see. If you are not listening to your guides, or you don’t recognize and follow the signs they’re sending, you may be missing out on easier ways to enact your intention.

When I do readings for clients, one of the best questions people ask me is “what was my intention in incarnating into this life? What did I want to do here?” Your guides will tell you, and then you’ll have a much clearer idea of what direction to head to reach a fulfilling life.

You Become Influenced by Others
Another thing that can stop you from realizing your intention, and I see this all the time with my clients, is that you become influenced by someone else’s life or plan and you get caught up in their plan instead of yours.

Let’s say you came here to teach love and compassion, but you meet and fall in love with this person who has a lot of emotional baggage.

You are excited because you know you can shower this person with love and compassion, but it turns out they are a narcissist and you spend years trying to help them, pouring all your love and compassion into this one person.

You become depleted, having nothing left for yourself and certainly nothing left for the people you were intending to help. You got sidetracked by one person and their influence over you. Happens all the time.

As you’re tooling along in life, if you know why you’re here, you can stay focused on your mission and you won’t be easily sidetracked by others.

You’re Afraid to Take that Path
This is a big one. You’ve got an intention that’s really impactful but it’s going to require a lot of courage to get it. Maybe you came here to teach love but you’re too afraid to share your thoughts and ideas on the matter.

Maybe you came here to help other people survive, but you’re too worried about how you will survive so you focus on acquiring resources for yourself and/or your family and never get around to helping others.

Maybe you came here to try something dangerous and you’re afraid of getting hurt. Maybe you came here to sing but you can’t get over your stage fright.

Fear can stop you from manifesting your intention.

You Change Your Mind
Sometimes people don’t reach their goal because a new intention takes its place.

Perhaps when you were in the ether you decided you wanted to incarnate to make an impact on people’s understanding of the universe. But somewhere along the way you develop a more driving intention… you want to bring love to the world.

So you shift gears, set a new intention, and get busy making it happen. That’s totally fine. Free will trumps everything here. You are allowed to change your intention. There is no judgment or regret from the other side on this.


We create our own lives. There is no destiny. As much as the other side tries to stack the deck so we can manifest our intentions, once we incarnate the other side has to sit back and watch what we do. They offer guidance but no guarantees.

So listen to your heart, follow your intuition, get in tune with why you came here. Don’t let fear stop you and don’t be afraid to change your trajectory.

And if you aren’t sure why you’re here, we can ask your guides and find out.

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